Getting to the water… Trusting Part 1
In the old testament there is a mother, Jochebed, who is forced to trust God completely with her son Moses. Decisions had to be made swiftly and she could no longer hold him back from the inevitable. We experience the very same moments in our children’s lives as we are forced into decisions that have to be made and trust having to take precedence. Jochebed, walked to the Nile, the very river Pharaoh had ordered his people to use as means of killing all the boys that were born, she placed him in a basket to float away, trusting God would take care of him and that His plan was perfect.
I have watched as my third child’s high school days have come to an end. It has been a bitter sweet ending for us as she is our first daughter and the emotions for this child’s graduation were different than those of her brothers. I don’t know if it was because she was the first girl, if it’s because of the role she plays in our home, or if it’s because we are at the half way mark in our family to having all of our kids through this milestone, but none the less this one was more painful than expected. This entire last year has been filled with college tours, standardized tests, application processes, resumes, and the dreaded essays with complete writers block. We traveled in state, out of state, considered important details down to minute details. The Tigers, the Hogs, the Mavericks, the Roadrunners, the Elephants.. you name it. We went so far as to consider if she would look good in that color or this color, and which mascot sounded the best being cheered for. None of which really mattered but at the time, it was a detail in the narrowing down process. We laughed, we cried. It’s too close, too far, too hot, too cold…Goldilocks what is the best fit for you? Is there a perfect fit if you haven’t really tried it on? She was accepted to some, denied by others, again we celebrated and again we cried. Heartbreak is part of it and we watched as acceptance letters rolled in and doubt joined. Uncertainty of where the best “fit” for her crept in and consumed her mind and thoughts. Some colleges truly didn’t want to know anything about who she was, they wanted to know her GPA, her ACT, SAT, her rank, really she was nothing more than a number on a piece of paper to most of them. Sure, they want to see the resume, they wanted her to write these lengthy essays, but sadly I can’t even confirm if anyone even read the essays she wrote. She was not alone, I spoke with kid after kid, some with GPA’s and scores that I could not believe were being denied by colleges because they didn’t apply soon enough or weren’t ranked high enough due to the competition of their specific graduating class. What happened to the good ole average kid? I was that kid? I have a radiology degree, I am a real estate agent and spend 90% of my time doing volunteer work and writing. My SAT and ACT scores, my rank even my degree mean very little if anything at this point in my life. My daughter by most standards is considered well above average, in my eyes and in the eyes of the only one who matters, the Lord, she is perfect just as she is. But Moms we have to continuously stand in the gap for our children when friends, peers, teachers, tests, scores and yes colleges, tell them otherwise. She is more than a number, she is funny, compassionate, kind, giving, moody (aren’t all woman), head strong, determined, she will tell you like it is (gets that from her momma), will help a friend in need, loves deeply, forgives yet cautiously forgets, stresses about the small stuff, worries about everyone and everything, is self disciplined beyond her years, self motivated, a leader, the first one to comply with requests, a pleaser, a peacemaker, I could go on and on. You can’t put a number on those qualities, and all of those will go much farther in life than a GPA, an ACT, SAT or a class rank and for that I think we have done a great job and the world is hers to conquer. So with all of this, our past year as parents have been eye opening on so many levels, the most obvious one being to make sure our daughter is reminded daily that her value does not lie in a number, a rank, an acceptance, even her future degree. As of 24 hours ago she is moved into her college, the one I truly believe God chose for her and I hope she realizes her value lies in all of those amazing qualities listed above, in the good she will do as a future nurse, a future wife and mother, a child of God. Her value lies in what she will do with all of those qualities God has blessed her with and how she will share them with others. This is what makes her valuable. The rest of those numbers are fleeting and mean nothing in the grand scheme of life.
My hope for this post is for all the Mommas who are stressing about the perfect college, the perfect GPA, the perfect rank. I have been there, and I stressed and failed miserably on trusting the process. I was no Jochebed, and I am certainly no expert but I know this, Gods plan is so much better than my own. As long as you can stay focused on that, guide with patience, reassurance and trust Him, it will all work out just as He has designed.
Until Next Time, Courtney